Shockingly, today is the first time in over a year that we’ve seen any fresh coronavirus odds.
As political as the virus has been – and given how it affected the entire leadup to the 2020 Presidential election (and, frankly, set the table for The Big Steal™ as countless swing states illegally instituted widespread Cheat By Mail™ with zero security or oversight) – it’s honestly a little surprising to see two of the three prominent election betting sites post new COVID lines.
First Letter In Name Of Next COVID “Variant Of Concern”
- S +200
- T +300
- P +300
- O +350
- C +400
- A +400
- B +400
- R +450
- G +500
- U +500
- Z +500
- L +500
- D +600
- K +600
- M +700
- I +700
- X +700
- N +800
If you weren’t aware of how these alleged but unfalsifiable coronavirus “variants” are named, they’re ordered per the Greek alphabet. Alpha, beta, gamma, delta, and so (epsil)on.
Right now, we’re on the Omicron Variant™, even though we should be on the Xi Variant™ (you know, as in “Xi wiz, enough with the COVID porn already!”).
However, since the spineless WHO didn’t want to ruffle any feathers in China, they decided to skip X and go straight to O. (A more blatant XOXO to the reds there ain’t.)
Now, given that the Omigod Variant™ is “the most easily-transmissible strain of coronavirus yet,” the whole world – even the fully vaccinated – have been asked to mask up yet again.
So much for that Faustian bargain.
(As an aside, how does masking against Omicron even make any sense? If this is a 0-micron virus we’re dealing with, masks can’t possibly make any kind of measurable difference.)
So what comes next?
Well, as we near the end of the alphabet, these are the potential options that remain after the Omicron Variant™ finishes its book tour:
- Pi Variant™
- Rho Variant™
- Sigma Variant™
- Tau Variant™
- Upsilon Variant™
- Phi Variant™
- Chi Variant™
- Psi Variant™
- Omega Variant™
Since three of the final nine possibilities start with the letter P, that’s what we’re going with.
Probably not Psi, though. They’re going to save that one for the coronavirus that no longer spreads by air and goes straight from one brain to another, Democrat propaganda style.
Incidentally, the Omega Variant™ will obviously be the final boss, and that shouldn’t hit US shores until right before the 2022 Midterm elections. If the US House odds and US Senate odds are anything to go by, the left’s going to need all the help it can get.
Also incidentally, be sure not to confuse the Sigma Variant™ with the Ligma Variant™. That latter version has already gone viral (as has the similarly horrific Sugma Variant™).
At BetOnline Sportsbook, the new COVID line is a little different, though it’s far more outrageous in its nuance:
Will Donald Trump and Joe Biden issue a joint vaccine statement?
- No -5000
- Yes +1200
This one might as well be No -1000000. There’s no way in the world Trump sees eye to eye with Basement Joe on anything, nor should he.
While Trump’s Operation Warp Speed led to the rapid development of several COVID vaccines, the two men have a major difference of opinion when it comes to administering those vaccines.
Trump wants people to be free to choose for themselves whether or not to take the experimental drugs, while Biden wants to hold people hostage until they take the drugs under protest and duress.
Biden’s even willing to withhold therapeutics from states that don’t mandate COVID masking and vaccination for their residents.
Anyway, take the free money. It’s not a lot of free money, but it’s free money all the same.
2021 Joe Biden Presidential Mental Fitness Test Update
Will Joe Biden complete his full first term?
- Yes -220 (-220)
- No +155 (+155)
Can you even imagine three more years of this ridiculous circus sideshow?
Joe Biden Exit Date
- 2025 -140 (-140)
- Not Before 2026 +335 (+335)
- 2022 +400 (+400)
- 2023 +550 (+550)
- 2024 +1400 (+1400)
- 2021 +15000 (+15000)
Equal money on 2022 and 2023. If you’re New Year’s Resolution is to score some free cash, you’re welcome.
Will Joe Biden be impeached and removed from office?
- No -900 (-900)
- Yes +500 (+500)
For the last time (until next time), NO.
Joe Biden Approval Rating On Jan. 1, 2022
- N/A (Over 43% -160, Under 43% +120)
As of December 31, 2021, Joe Biden’s approval rating – as aggregated by the leftist shills at FiveThirtyEight – is sitting at 43.4%. It’s looking like the over’s going to eke out a win.
Hopefully, you took our advice.
Will Joe Biden be reelected to a second term?
- No -550 (-550)
- Yes +325 (+325)
Once again, our end-of-year prediction is the same now as it was 365 days ago: Not a chance.